I am always amazed how so many of life’s greatest lessons and blessings accompany my greatest loses. Two weeks ago I received a urgent call from my older brother Jeff, in Utah, informing me that my father’s health had taken a turn for the worse and that the doctor’s did not expect him to make it through the night.

The Gift Of Grief

I immediately booked a flight out of Oakland, California and raced to be by his side before he passed. I thank God that my father found the strength to hold on long enough to accommodate my travel. One of the greatest gifts of my life was to be able to hold my father’s hand for the last 10 minutes of his life and to talk him through his journey to the other side. I have never felt more alive than in those final moments of by dad’s life.

In the week between my father’s passing and his memorial services, the blessings continued to flow into my life. Through the loss of our father, my three brothers and I created the relationship we had always dreamed of. Together we cried, laughed and shared a journey through resentment, pain and anger into amazing joy, love and forgiveness.

I shared at my dad’s memorial that my only remaining regret was not really knowing that my father was proud of me. Who would have guessed that my journey with my father was not yet over. Two days later I traveled to Washington state to assist with a Personal Mastery class within the prison system.

As soon as I entered the room noticed a man that could have been my father’s twin brother. He not only looked just like dad, he sounded like him and acted just like him. This gentleman sat with a stubborn and stern look on his face for the first two days.

Following one emotionally intense exercise on the final day, my father’s twin turned around, looked me directly in the eyes and gave me a “Thumbs Up”. Thanks for making it so clear that you are proud of me dad.

D. Scott Pullan

C.S. Advanced Facilitator and Compassionate Samurai